


Gateway to Totality

by HorseTechie



Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Angst, Anime/Manga Fusion, But Satan just wants to raise hell again, Demon possession, Developing Friendships, Dont want to give away too much of plot with these tags, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Gate of Ghenna, Love Triangles, Lucifer has Feelings, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, References to Depression, Rin is left to figure it all out, Rinshiweek Tumblr prompt for the Gate of Gehenna, Shiemi gets caught in the middle, Shima aint helping, Total Solar Eclipse, Trust Issues, Yukio is messed up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-11-30
Packaged: 2018-12-18 04:58:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11867235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HorseTechie/pseuds/HorseTechie
Summary: Eclipses could also be created by the dark thoughts and blinding feelings within each other as new relationships are strained. The demonic activities all around only make matters worse when Rin realizes the two most important people in his life disappear.  Shiemi is also confronted with making a difficult decision of her own.  (ON HIATUS)





	1. Black Hole Sun

**Author's Note:**

> This was an idea I was playing around with for some time now, and decided to use it for a RinShiweek submission. Time line wise, this AU happens before Christmas/Bday party and 2nd Kyoto trip. 
> 
> The dates and locations of actual eclipses have been changed in this story, since this is all fiction anyways! Besides the astronomical eclipse, there seems to be a metaphysical one between Rin (sun), Sheimi (moon), and Yukio (earth).

" _Be careful what you think because your thoughts control your life." (Proverbs 4:23)_

* * *

 

The dull pain served as a constant reminder that he just wasn't able to heal quickly like his demon brother. Two months was the average time it took for bone to heal, and that was the length of time Yukio had for the multiple fractures in his ribs and his arm. He was still 'normal'. In addition, the medicine the hospital prescribed gave him the worse case of nausea, but going without any pain killers just made it hard to concentrate.

The younger Okumura twin had injected morphine a few times already in the last couple of days for want of something to erase the pain without any heavy side effects. Now he fought with the nagging temptation to continue using that as his primary pain killer. He knew full well the limited supply of morphine he had was to be used for emergency reasons only. Even if he found a way to get the authorization to replenish his supply, the narcotic would be detected in his medical check-ups.

The truth was that Yukio wasn't able to rest peacefully since he left the hospital. The pain reminded him of everything that went wrong during that mission at Aomori. Even though he was excused from teaching, the young exorcist prodigy insisted on coming into the branch office to work on something.  _Something,_  to keep his mind distracted.

On his way back home, however, his persistent fear grew to the point it started to crush in on him. His coat was too heavy, the scarf felt like it had been wound on too tight. The afflicted Okumura twin ran into the dark interior hallway of the abandoned dormitory before he buckled upon himself. The bandages felt tighter around his chest, constricting him as the pain throbbed with each pounding heartbeat. Something powerful was crushing, smothering, strange arms, limbs, monstrous faces.. trying to take him under. Trying to sieze his soul. 

_Stop it..stop it.. stop… it._

Yukio gripped his head, fingers digging into his hair, trying to calm down. It hurt to expand his ribs, his lungs seared with a sharp pain, he couldn't breathe in. He was slipping, loosing all control, but..  _nothing_  stopped that feeling. The scared boy had no power to save himself from the cold, dark air suffocating him. The darkness of Hell.

And wondering why..  _why_  his failures kept haunting him… was he not good enough for God as an excorcist? 

Yukio almost died in the clutches of that snake as a result, because nothing from within himself saved him that time. 

 _Nothing_ … not even Satan.

He was not even worthy enough for the Ruler of Darkness...

_Who am I then?_

The stars in Yukio's eyes danced in the dark, and he felt faint from his shortness of breath. He was just a miserable, weak human… not even regarded by others as a son of anyone. Well, a 'had been', more like, as Father Fujimoto's good kid. That sharp pain was still there when the genius boy tried to draw in another breath. Maybe that was caused from pleurisy, when the lining of the lungs stick together from dehydration. He forced himself to think about these more logical things in order to steady his pounding heart. Before someone found him there in this sad and weak state.

The sharp edge from the metal key pressing into the flesh inside his good hand also helped redirect that focus. That little, damned thing was what had brought on this attack. He had found the key, an Illuminati key, in the pocket of his long uniformed exorcist's jacket. All he could imagine was that Shima had slipped it to him earlier.

He closed his eyes, head falling back against the hard, brick wall. The lines were blurring again, and he still tried to understand where Mephisto Pheles stood in all this. There was no one to trust, really, if they  _all_  were pawns in some grander scheme of things. Even Shura had been asked to spy on his exwire class in the beginning, just to make sure he and his brother stayed in check.

 _Why_..?

None of it was fair. The way the higher ups handled both himself and his brother in a shroud of secrecy that not even the people he felt closest with was allowed to share. Being regarded in this way ate at him. It made sense that they didn't want Rin to know, the idiot that he was, but he should at least have the right. Yukio had been trained so young, and given the authority as a professor, so why can he be trusted with more?

A new plan came together in his mind as the dizziness subsided. Yukio slowly rose back up to his feet to walk back outside. He couldn't go back to his dorm room now.

* * *

With the exam date for the Exwires set to take place later next month, after the beginning of the new year, the number of times they met to study became much more frequent. The more tedious of their studies happened to be on the types of demons, the effects of pharmaceuticals, and on scripture due to the importance in remembering every nuance about them. The three had met in the library, at one of the tables set apart from the rest of the shelved sections.

Originally they had started with Biblical scripture, but they were soon distracted by just wanting to find more answers on recent events. With the increase of humans being able to see demons, without any other reason, and demons appearing in unpredictable places, they wondered those were more forewarning signs of worse things to come. The knowledge that the Illuminati had declared war against the True Order at the festival a month ago felt to be the other reason.

"Gyah, I'm definitely  _not_  going to be an Aria,  _why_  do I need to study this too?" Rin finally grumbled, closing the old Bible. If he had to pick a second specialty for his meister, he decided it would be as a tamer. That was mostly due to how his empathetic demon connection with other spirits worked in his favor – even if his brother hated it. Sure, Rin may have Satan's powers, but he certainly did not have the sinful desire and bloodlust that the Demon God was known for.

"Because knowing  _what_  is going on when the verse is being chanted is  _why_!" Suguro growled to the demon boy.

"But.. didn't Lightening say we could just  _simplify_  the whole process by just being on good terms with demons?" Rin refuted just as strongly.

Earlier, the reluctant Okumura twin had agreed to look through the book of Revelations earlier, after being told to stop paraphrasing the erotic lines of script found in the Song of Songs that he came across. (Or more like, that Shima said something about and he had to see for himself.) Rather than being enlightened, the doomsday warnings in Revelations were written in such a symbolic way, it only confused him more. Deep down, the verses also sickened Rin because they reminded him of his unfortunate lineage.

"Look, before you can simplify it, you have to  _know_  what you are  _doing_  first!" The elder Suguro just glared at him in disbelief, the creases in his brow becoming more pronounced.

"As long as I know what I'm doing for my meister, that's what really counts!" Rin also felt his temper flaring up more over this really annoying topic.

"Why is studying scripture even a  _problem_? Didn't you grow up in a monastery?"

"I wasn't exactly what you'd call the  _perfect_  altar boy... like you!"

Suguro just snorted, then shook his finger at the ignorant teen. "All the reason why  _you_  need to study, if you want to pass!"

Well, even though Rin had spent fifteen years at a monastery and was raised by the religious teachings of the monks, the defiant teen had blew it all off as pomp and circumstance. Now he hated to look back at that, because he  _had_  taken it all for granted. He never really took any of it seriously before that day he actually became a demon. The rebellious teen was even bad about remembering to use the proper honorifics when addressing people.

But now,  _now_  the meaning in the verses ended up haunting him in a whole different way. It was harder to stay focused on the text through this. Plus if he had no interest in becoming an Aria, then why the hell would they be testing him on that?

Konekomaru was a little more understanding, looking away from his laptop to regard the silent standoff between the two. "Then.. how about looking through the first books of the New Testament, Okumura-kun? Just for clues at least on what's going on with the increase in demons?"

"Right…" Rin sighed after a moment's pause. He flipped back through the pages again in his text to locate the book of Matthew.

The young monk had been researching world news at the moment. Already he had been noticing some interesting patterns in the rise of terrorist activity, as well as an increase in destructive, hot forest fires, droughts, and wave after wave of relentless hurricanes from earlier that fall in various areas around the world.

"Oh... hey.. there's also a total eclipse that will be occurring in a few days from now," Konekomaru told them as well|.

"Really? Where?"

"The path starts in Russia and crosses over to Alaska."

"Where's the strongest point?" Suguro asked.

"Ah.. looks like it's at this remote, north-eastern part of Russia," he pointed to the map on the screen for them

"And that's not good either?" Rin wondered.

"Generally, yes. Eclipses are regarded with much reverence due to its supernatural effect on the spiritual world," Konekomaru explained, looking off more research he found about it. "During an eclipse, especially a total solar one, the ghosts and demons absorb more of its black energy to negatively affect humankind."

"Hah… so looking at a total eclipse can also burn your eyes with the Flames of Satan! Booo-sc-chh!" Rin joked with his hand exaggerations exploding all around.

"Not.. quite…" Konekomaru just smiled politely, because apparently they didn't find what he said to be that funny.

Suguro sighed, taking a moment to clarify for Rin's sake. "What he's saying is that eclipses make demons stronger."

"Especially those like.. Mephisto?" Rin frowned, because after all, that demon was the King of Time and a whole other load of bullshit. Rin could only imagine the tricks he could pull with more power!

"More like Lucifer... Sir Pheles stated he was on the side of humans," Suguro clarified.

"But isn't Lucifer the King of  _Light_? How did he get on the wrong side anyway," Because yes, that was a question that also bugged Rin.

"Well, I read that he used to be one of God's best angels, until he challenged God's authority to the point He cast Lucifer down to Hell," Suguro crossed his arms, sitting back. "Satan succeeded at tempting that angel, because as the God of Gehenna, he had always envied the liberties that the God of Heaven provided humans."

Rin remained silent for a few long seconds when the words had brought up another carefully guarded memory of what Satan himself told him. How the Demon God's power was too strong to possess any human for long, and quite literally burned their body from the inside out.

Except for Rin. He could exist as Satan's half  _human_  son, with his demon power inside of him, and  _endure_  living in this world. Could he be strengthened by eclipse power too?

"Tsch.. like two brats fighting over the sandbox," was all Rin really cared to say.

"Hah, that's a funny way to put it," Konekomaru mused. But then he also had more information to add. "Then it also says the negative energy demons get from an eclipse can last a couple months afterwards."

"That could explain all this weird shit going on… " Rin twisted his mouth in thought, then sat up more. "Wait, but aren't eclipses regional? Would that one in Russia be able to affect us here?"

"Not sure really… unless Satan had other plans. I heard rumors of eclipses that could be conjured in the spiritual world by powerful sorcery as well."

"You think they are aware of it?"

"Hnn…" Suguro just sighed, sitting back into his chair.

"Aware and doing something about it, or  _hiding_  the fact? Mephisto is such a sick fuck about that stuff," Rin growled. He was clearly still worked up about the 'games' that particular demon liked playing with the Exwires, treating all of them like pawns. Sure, the others were playing it safe by doing what was expected of them, but he still felt like something else is going on. The fact Yukio had been getting even more stressed out about 'stuff' was another reason.

The others didn't really have anymore to say in response, apparently not wanting to get into a discussion about those kind of conspiracy theories. With a sigh, the demon twin began flipping through the pages of Matthew. Of course, that chapter starts off with the story of Jesus. Perfect.

"Okay, so this is the question: If Jesus is the Son of God and I am the Son of Satan—"

" _How_  can you even compare yourself to.. to the Son of God!?" Suguro blurted out, bringing his hand down on the table.

Konekomaru seemed to look a bit started from the sudden racket.

"No, seriously!" Rin explained to Suguro without any hesitation. "From what I'm reading here, Jesus wasn't exactly all that great of a person… he caused a shit-load of trouble too!"

"And then got himself executed for it!" Suguro protested, the implication of Rin's own death sentence being left unsaid.

"But He was  _supposed_  to die… he was an offering!" Rin quickly refuted that claim. Simply because if Rin had been saved from the beginning, there must have been a greater reason for why he got these second (and third) chances to continue as the Son of Satan. Certainly he could not be an 'offering' too. ....Right?

"Where are we going with this?" Konekomaru wondered, finally showing his subtle impatience with their persistent arguing.

Suguro held his heated stare on Rin, as if he was hoping for a better answer to this crazy idea.

"What I'm saying is that Jesus was born for a purpose. It was to keep people  _out_  of Hell… Gehenna," Rin explained. He wasn't too sure how the rest of it worked, because yeah, from what these verses described, Satan tried so many times to tempt the Son of God away from what God expected too. "So that day when Satan came for me, he said that I was what he needed to bring Gehenna  _into_  Assiah.. which I guess is here, Earth."

"What?"

Rin realized he never told them all those details, quite like this. Mostly it was due to the secrecy he had to keep. But now since they all knew about his lineage, it felt weird that he hadn't told them after everything else they had been through. "Dunno what my brother told you... but after I found out I was the Son of Satan, I I got into an argument with my old man. Then Satan possessed him, and he started dragging me into Gehenna.. there was  _no_  way he was going to do that! The only way to stop it was to awaken my demon powers from my sword to save us.. to close the gate. My old man still died though, trying to get Satan out of himself…"

"S-sorry to hear…" Konekomaru murmured.

Suguro seemed to have clammed up, evidently processing this new revelation of information in his own way.

"So.. that's why I want to be an exorcist and to stop Satan! I'm not sure why Father Fujimoto raised me, keeping all this secret before, but after defeating the Impure King… I realized I am in control of my flames. They may have come from Satan, but Satan is  _not_  going to be in control of me!" If he wanted to be bluntly honest, it still bothered Rin that his  _own_  brother chose to leave him in a jail cell to die instead of believing in him, like his classmates had. It was Shiemi's words that had made the biggest impact, helping him realize how he could control the burn.

While Rin wasn't also the most obedient of kids under Fujimoto's care, he at least had understood that God had more power than Satan, or any other troublesome demon. His foster dad had also told him to first try help others with mercy and grace. At least that was the idea. If Rin did get in trouble, it was because he was trying to  _stop_  the punks from hurting others. Unfortunately, his super strength and unbridled temper had somehow amplified his actions for the worse.

"Even though I'm no good at studying scripture, I do _know_  what it takes," he finished with a nod.

Then as if realizing he had been silent for too long, Suguro laughed once and slapped Rin on the shoulder. "I guess you do have experience with kicking Satan's ass after all."

"Exactly!" Rin grinned openly, very much agreeing with that.

"But you  _still_  need to study," Suguro gestured to the books. A moment later, the big guy stood up, pulling out his phone to check a new text. "And… I.. gotta go. Until next time!"

The two watched him walk away, finding that the elder Exwire's departure seemed a little abrupt. "That was sudden," Konekomaru scratched his head.

"At least he was able to come  _this_  time," Rin sighed, propped his elbows on the table to rest his head on his hands.

* * *

Shiemi set down her clipboard after reviewing the current inventory in stock within the numerous shelves and cubbies within her mother's shop. Evening was setting, and going over the end of day details was all she had left to do. There were times she missed the friendships she had made at the Exorcist cram school, and the challenging adventures they went on. Not all of what she learned was wasted, as the young blonde teenager did appreciate knowing also the more formal names of the herbs and like pharmaceuticals in their inventory.

The chime of the door opening caught her attention, and she turned to greet her customer. Much to her surprise, it was Shima Renzou.

"Shima-kun.. hi," she acknowledged him, but soon had noticed how worried he looked. Apart from the fact he'd never visited her here before, the combination of Shima and worried was not normal. He also had his staff with him too. "What can I help you with?"

"Yes, help is what I need. Rin is in trouble!" her pink-headed classmate wasted no time in explaining why he was there.

"Wh-what? What happened to him?" she stepped around the counter to walk closer.

"There isn't time to explain. I just need you to come with me!" Shima's voice somehow sounded more bold and ominous this time.

"Oh.. okay, well, let me get—" she stepped away in want of getting her coat and other things.

"No, we really don't have time. We must go!" the insistent teen reached out and firmly grabbed her wrist. A for a fleeting moment, some of his mischievous nature played at the corners of his lips. His eyes flashed brighter as he pulled her along.

"Wha- where are we going?!" Shiemi really did not like how tightly Shima gripped her arm while he practically drug her towards the front door. "It's cold outside!"

"Hah-hah! Not where we are going. Don't worry about that, my dear!"

Suddenly her heart quickened a beat when a new fear seized her. That laugh really didn't sound like Shima's. Nor was she able to break her wrist free from his grip as the both of them stepped outside. "You're not— are you-"

The door slammed shut, and still not letting her go he pulled out a key. "This will take us to where Okumuru-kun is at," the words slipped out with that odd tone to it when the door opened to someplace outdoors where the sun still shone brightly. The Illuminati spy pushed her through, willing Yamantaka to keep his control over the girl.

* * *

"Hnn.. we should probably call it quits," Rin tapped his pen on the table, noticing the time. Just not staying focused on his studies for long was typical for him, but this time he had been feeling more restless than usual. That feeling was bugging him on and off all day, in fact, and also what had been making him more irritable.

"Yeah, might as well," Konekomaru nodded.

"Getting hungry too," Rin added, pushing aside the books. He was fancying a new idea of inviting his classmates to his dorm for dinner later, when his phone rang.

The demon exorcist-in-training recognized Shura's caller ID and automatically had that unwanted feeling of dread that he might be in trouble. She wasn't training him as rigorously now that he was showing improvement, but he still had that knee-jerk reaction when she showed up unexpectedly.

"Have you seen Yukio?" his mentor asked him with urgency in her voice.

"Not since yesterday afternoon… why?" Rin's concern changed from his own to wondering about what happened to his astute twin. Despite his younger brother's recent injuries, he still kept odd hours. That was really starting to bug Rin, because he thought for sure that Yukio would take the needed recovery time to actually rest. Yukio wasn't in the dorm anywhere either when Rin got up early to meet with Shura for training that morning. Plus it was Saturday, and their winter break had started. What would be keeping his brother so preoccupied now?

"He's not answering either one if his phones, which isn't like him," she continued.

"Yeah, he  _always_  answers his calls," Rin knitted his brows as he spoke. "All I know was that he was out again last night." Even more unsettling was when he asked Shura about his older brother's 'special training' earlier that day. She had echoed the same question in return, indicating that she had also wondered about it.

Shura sighed loud enough to be heard over the phone. "Lemme get back with you."

She hung up before he could say much else. Rin clenched his jaw, now feeling if this was also why he had been on edge all day. Something really wasn't right.

After their mission to rescue Shura from that perverted snake demon, Rin noticed how much more dedicated she had become about her actions, and in her follow through with teaching him the sword. That made him happy in knowing he helped her realize that she had the power to take control of her life. Rin could relate to a degree.

* * *

" _Hey, watch yer form, okay? One hand close to the hilt and the other close to the end of the handle. That will give you better control!" the reclined redhead shouted at him from the side of the room._

_The demon boy clenched his jaw, trying to remember that stupid detail again. Now that he had demonstrated his understanding behind the techniques using his flames, she wanted him to become familiar with more traditional sword maneuvers that demanded precision. Rin had no problem applying the power to make the blade sing. It was just his agility and reaction time that needed work. Learning how to stay fluid and light in his movements proved to be the real challenge since he tended to be heavy-handed with the amount of power he packed._

" _Not every demon's going to be as big as the ones you've fought so far!" Shura winced, after Rin's twenty-something time of missing many of the small targets placed around the room. What made it tough was that she had also turned off the lights, otherwise making them harder to see in the erratic flicker of his flames._

" _Okay.. take five," she sighed, after pocketing the stop watch in her jean jacket._

_Rin grumbled under his breath about how lame this was while sheathing his sword. The lights came back on soon after._

" _We'll get back to that after another round in the batting cage."_

_Rin leaned on the wall next to her and drank from his bottle of water. More reflex training , yey. He was getting better at that, much better, when he could actually see what was coming at him. But he still had a long way to go before he was as good as her._

" _Hey.. so is Yukio doing any better?" Shura dropped her instructor front for a moment to be more personable. During their battle to save her from Hachirotaro, the snake god had injured the younger Okumura enough to make Shura worry. He could tell she was being serious, because she didn't say 'Four Eyes'._

_Some of what Yukio said to Hachirotaro in his ruse to trick him, about wanting to be stronger and to regenerate, still hung in the back of Rin's mind. Ever since they started at the school together, Rin had discovered more things about Yukio that seemed surprising. The most troubling issue was how the younger Okumura felt about him now that his powers were awakened. At first it was fear, but now it felt more like envy. After all, Yukio was the only one with the most injuries after that mission._

_Rin shook his head, unable to find the accurate words to describe their current situation. "I'm not really sure… but it seems like he's been avoiding me lately. Anytime I try to talk with him, he just.. shuts down."_

_Shura just nodded her head. "I saw him asleep at his desk at the branch office when I stopped in earlier to get something."_

" _Really?" Finding his brother asleep in weird places was also becoming a reoccurring thing._

" _Something's been bothering him…" the fire-orange redhead sighed, before continuing more quietly. "When Hachiro forced me to make out with him, Yukio was absolutely terrified, and he kept his eyes shut the whole time – which was weird."_

_Rin quirked his mouth briefly at that crazy thought, despite her concern. But it was brief, and he nodded as his eyes fell to the floor. He knew why, from past experiences when Yukio used to get bullied a lot in middle school. He rarely had any friends to stand by him either. "Yeah.. he never liked feeling.. powerless."_

_Shura nodded, pursing her lips. Rin felt he didn't need to say anything more. While he himself just started training with her, he knew the sorted relationship between Shura and his younger brother went much deeper._

_Rin set down his water bottle before picking up a wooden bokken leaning against the wall. He gripped the smooth wood lightly, glancing once to his mentor. "I don't think Yukio's gotten over the old man's death either," the older Okumura twin added solemnly._

" _Yep," she stood up, indicating break time was over. "Because Four Eyes hasn't accepted who he is."_

" _Well, yeah… he can't even take care of himself!" Rin sensed her change in tone and attempted to follow suit. There really wasn't much more he could say about his younger half anyway, besides agreeing that Yukio still hasn't accepted him for being a half demon with Satan's powers._

* * *

Rin exchanged worried glances with Konekomaru, when he remembered that Shima had declined their invitation earlier to justify together.

"Would Shima know? The nosey butt that he is..?" Rin asked him.

"I'll give him a call."

Rin sat in silence, listening to the faint dial tone purr repetitively many times before switching into voicemail. He glanced at his own phone, just in case he missed anything. He didn't, and then tapped on Yukio's contact listing to try to reach him also.

"Wait, I'm going to text him too," Koneku added, his fingers tapping across the small screen.

Rin rose in the seat, awaiting a pick-up. Instead the operator explained his phone service was not available, not even for voicemail. Why would he turn off his phone? He frowned as Konekomaru looked at him, shaking his head about not getting any response yet.

The two decided to head out of the library so they can find the others, because this was getting worrisome.

They had started down the steps outside the building when Rin's phone buzzed again. Hoping it would be his brother, he answered it right away without checking the ID.

"Hey, where—"

" _Rin, it's me,"_ Shura interrupted him.

"Oh.. yeah... did you hear from Yukio?"

" _No, Yukio's still MIA. But I just got word that Mrs. Moriyama called to let us know Shiemi wasn't at the shop. She wondered if she was with any of you?_ "

"Ut.. no," Rin make a face, then looked to Konekomaru. "Have you heard anything about Shiemi?" he whispered. His monk friend shook his head 'no'.

" _Well, her mom is also very angry, just to warn ya. Apparently Miss Moriyama left unexpectedly, without leaving a note or locking up,"_ Shura explained with a stern but cautionary tone.

Either way, Rin didn't like the pretentious nature to this news. Driven by a protective, almost territorial instinct, his first hunch was that she must be with Yukio. Those two did like to meet up at random times for stuff.

".. _Rin_?"

"Yeah, I heard you… Shiemi's not been with us. My only guess is that she's with Yukio.. somewhere!"

" _You think so? I'm not sure… we found that Yukio left both of his phones behind in a drawer of his desk_ ," Shura continued.

"He did?!"

" _Yeah, no notes or anything. He hasn't said anything to you..?_ "

"No.. and that's what's so weird about all of this!" Rin sounded more exasperated. Not knowing where his brother went was bad enough, but Shiemi too? More than ever, he wanted to head out to look for them, xcept he didn't know where to start. "Has Mephisto said anything? Wh-What can I do?"

" _Rin.. just hold tight until I find out, okay?"_

Rin gritted his teeth, not happy with that answer however. "Fine... but if I don't hear anything soon!"

" _Rin, I'm serious._ "

The demon boy just hung up on her, his mind now churning with possibilities that he could start with.

 

 


	2. Awake My Soul

"I do not kill with my gun. He who kills with his gun has forgotten the face of his father. I kill with my heart." ~The 3rd Gunslinger's Creed from  _The Dark Tower_

* * *

Rin should have guessed Shura would be blowing him off in regards to something as important as this. It wasn't fair! Just wasn't!

How could he just stand still in wait when something possibly very wrong was going down? The agitated demon twin decidedly ended the call and pocketed his phone after moving up the strap of his sword bag on his shoulder.

"See you later," he breathed the words to Konekomaru before picking up the pace toward the old boy's dorm, where he stayed with his brother. Rin had the hunch that just maybe he might find something. Finding Yukio passed out cold in bed would be amazing.. he could hope that, right?

Realistically speaking, the older twin also knew how much as a creature habit, Yukio was always,  _always_ , prepared for everything he does. He can't go anywhere first without a checklist for all the required stuff. It still amazed Rin that his younger twin had a desk drawer full of back-up eyeglasses. For someone who hated having to wear glasses, he thought it funny that Yukio had so many. That, or the other time his younger had ordered three large boxes of his favorite energy drink.

Well, except until just recently, Mr. Four-eyes had not been acting as predictably. Rin really did not have a good answer as to why, other than his brother had been stressing over everything way too much.

After passing through the doors of the dorm, he backtracked over to the mess hall and the kitchen to check, nothing – not even a note. The bathroom they also use, again nothing. He finally burst into his dorm room, really hoping to see someone, but again.. nothing.

"Aww.. for fuck's sake," Rin growled, breathing heavily. He clenched his fists, wondering what he could do now. With a sigh, he dropped his sword on his bed, then went back to his original idea to see if Yukio actually had packed any of his stuff. If he hadn't, then maybe he was kidnapped.. somehow, with Shiemi.

 _Maybe.. he was here_ … Yukio's side of the room appeared very organized and clean, with not even a wrinkle to be seen on his bed cover. The top of his desk was cleared also, and the books at the end of his desk under the window were stacked up very neatly. The computer was turned off and the mouse and keyboard pushed up under the monitor. Honestly, he never paid close attention to how Yukio's side of the room looked earlier to know if that was how it always had been.

_Rin!_

The older Okumura twin turned at the sound of his name. He suddenly realized his familiar wasn't around either.

_Rin! You're back. Yukio locked me out. He didn't even give me any food… so huuungry.._

He felt Kuro rub up against his leg before jumping up on Rin's bed. In a split second, Rin snatched up Blacky and held him at eye level. He was hungry too, but locating his brother was far more important right now. "Yukio was here? What did he tell you? Where did he go?!" he uttered the questions all in one breath.

 _Yeah.. he was here. He looked stressed out… but that's not really new,_ Kuro rumbled, the confusion evident in the cat sith's tone.

"But did he say anything?"

 _Nothing I could understand. He told me to get out and then locked the door to your room_ , he reminded Rin.

"Mhh… well, according to Shura, he's gone missing now," Rin moved Kuro on his shoulders, then ran a hand through his hair, sweeping the long, dark bangs away from his eyes.

_Did Yukio run away?_

"I dunno… but sometimes.. he does that," Rin thought out loud, knitting his brows as he did. "Plus Shiemi's missing too."

He used to know a lot more about Yukio when they were kids, but after they entered middle school - or more like, by the time Rin got to middle school - he didn't really see much of his younger brother anymore. Of course, him being held back a grade while Yukio advanced up a grade didn't help much with that. When he would ask the other monks at the monastery about Yukio's whereabouts, they had said that he was helping out with an afterschool club, or attending a cram school. Then there were those other times when they looked worried, when Rin was back home for dinner and Yukio wasn't. He didn't think too much about it then, because they  _were_  teenagers wanting to test more and more of their freedoms.

It wasn't until Rin started at True Cross Academy himself that he realized how much he had  _not_  noticed about Yukio. How much of what Rin was told had been some kind of cover for the training his younger twin was subjected too? These stories and lies really amazed him at just how much of the line of work as an exorcist was hidden under a shroud of secrecy. It must be such a hassle to not be straightforward when you want to be. Trying to think about all the legalities flat out gave him a headache. So he didn't.

A short chime from his phone caused Rin to jump as his heart skipped a beat. The demon boy whipped it out to see who the text was from.

Shima.

…

Not his brother. But why would it be? He's never really gotten one from Yukio before.

Shima had said his phone had died, and otherwise been caught up in getting his hair touched up.

Rin bluntly swore out loud at how stupid of a reason that was. He had a very serious situation here, and what the pink-headed wimp was doing was… was so..  _ridiculous_! It took Rin a whole two minutes to calm down before he could read the second message. Kuro promptly decided Rin's bed would be a much safer place, away from demon boy's fuming flames, and leapt for safety there.

Fortunately, Shima's responses to his texts weren't nearly as vexing, but they didn't give him much hope either. Shima didn't know where Yukio was this time.

Annoyed by the lag time with the texts, he clicked the call button to discuss this matter directly.

"Hey," Rin started.

" _Yeah_?"

"I'm serious, Pinky…  _where_  is Yukio?" Rin asked again, with added emphasis in the tone of his voice. "Because Shiemi is missing now too!"

" _Wow… really?_ "

Rin sighed, not liking the sound of that response either. To think that he had faith in him. "Yeah..  _really_!"

" _So they are both missing at the same time? Do you think they.. eloped?_ "

"I totally  _think_  they eloped!" Rin agreed, "But that's beside the point. I want to know why, or where... or if they really are just in trouble."

" _But then, that means you don't think they did._.?"

"Yeah.. it's just so… sudden. It's not like Yukio to just.. act on impulse," Rin, for a moment, started to second-guess himself. Because he was the twin who rushed into things head-first with his flames blazing.

" _Well, I hadn't received any further orders to follow Okamura-sensei after he had been in the hospital, to know for sure,_ " Shima sounded like he was being truthful at that point.

"Wait… you were spying on him?"

" _Sir Pheles was curious,_ " Shima sighed. "Your _brother's been doing some scary stuff_."

"So you're the one who told him about the dangerous training? How come you didn't tell me?!"

" _Hey_ —"

"I mean, just what..  _what_  is it that he—"

" _Look, Rin_ —"

"He doesn't even want to tell  _me_  anything!"

" _It was because I was warned not to tell anyone about the assignment. But now…"_ the double spy's voice took on a more solemn tone as he nearly spoke at a whisper. " _His behavior doesn't make any sense. Your brother was literally risking his LIFE.. repetitively._ "

"What..?"

" _Before you guys went to Aomori, he jumped off a building, Rin!_ " Shima continued, now a couple octaves louder.

"The fuck..?"

" _And not in a stunt double kind of way. Your brother .. he's NOT okay_ …" Rin could tell from the sincerity in the spy's voice he was not kidding.

"Wh- why is he?"

" _Testing his limits..? Hell if I know… but I wouldn't be surprised if Okamura-sensei had just snapped.. and kidnapped Shiemi!_ "

"Testing his limits?  _Why_?"

" _Feh.. ask him the next time you see him_ ," Shima more or less blew him off too. He was pretty much on his own with this.

"Right…" Rin snorted, and otherwise just hung up. This phone conversation was only further agitating him. He clenched his teeth, wondering just how much shit Yukio had gotten himself into. Mephisto also thought his older twin was working far too much, and asked him to take it easy during their last mission. That was the first in a long time that Rin actually agreed with their jackass guardian. Regardless, Ron always had an instinctive drive to worry about the well-being of Yukio, no matter what (even though Yukio was smarter, and even taller, than him).

But to think that his younger took off with Shiemi? That left him feeling so twisted up, especially if Shima backed up that possibility. Was there more going on that they were keeping secret? If only he had something to prove this suspicion.

Rin turned around and walked to Yukio's wardrobe closet by the doorway for a quick look. He was a little surprised to see the long, black exorcist coat there, as was Yukio's leather ammo apron. But the gun holster was gone, which was expected since the younger Okumura never goes anywhere without his guns (the chicken). His winter coat and snow boots where also missing. Rin furrowed his brow and pursed his lips. His brother was outside somewhere. Did he go back out by that lake to look for Hachiro?

No, that didn't make sense.

Growing restless with not knowing anything, Rin came to the conclusion to go to the supply shop. Maybe,  _maybe_  he might gain more insight on the situation from what Shiemi's mother may know.

He grabbed his sword to leave, when Kuro questioned were he was going.

"I want to check something… something's not right," Rin muttered, not going into the details. He pulled his shoes back on, then picked up Kuro to take to the kitchen. "Don't worry, I'll get something for you to eat first."

* * *

It really hurt to breath again, as Yukio slowly ascended the final flight of stairs. Five flights of stairs hadn't been such an issue before, but now he was completely winded. Did the strain it took for his body to recover really sap that much energy? He quietly hoped so, because the troubled Okamura twin wasn't ready to accept that he had gotten out of shape. The last thing he wanted was to walk into his destination gasping for air and trying to keep from throwing up.

Yukio went to this stairwell of one of the academic halls on the True Cross campus because of its secluded location. Now standing on the platform at the top of the stairs, he transfixed his gaze on the locked door that led to the roof. Just had to steady his breathing and psych himself up that this plan was going to work. He had been spinning tall tales ever since he was eight, just to keep his exorcist training a secret from those who shouldn't know.

The mature fifteen year old closed his eyes, momentarily remembering how being in a place like this brought him security. Things were not as easy for him back in middle school as they were now. Somehow, being as smart as he was and the reputation he had, the older punks made him easy pickings.

As if the nickname 'Four-Eyes' wasn't enough, they also called him 'Yokai' due to his pale complexion and sickly disposition. Without his protective brother around, he had to do what he could to lay low and to slip in and around everyone, like a ghost. He had to learn how to stand up on his own, to fulfill his promise to Father Fujimoto by becoming a strong exorcist. Yukio always had to be on alert for bullies threatening him, demons teasing him, or even other girls just being way too nosey or flirtatious.

Yukio found refuge from everyone (even his brother, if he was lucky) by hiding in the uppermost level of the stairwells in his high school during his lunch breaks. There, he lost himself in a different text books from his exorcist studies, or on medicine and pharmacology. His high school life became a lonely one, only interacting just enough with others enough to get by. They often thought he had to leave early because he was sick, or a had another doctor appointment for treatments.

In reality, it was because he was called by the Order to investigate paranormal activity. It was ironic that back then, he used his weakness to hide who he really was from his classmates and his brother. Now, it was his enemy.

The saying 'the more you learn, the less you know' became more true with each passing month after Fujimoto had passed. Yukio was not so sure about the reasons that he had been told before. Reasons, or lies. It took one slip of the tongue from Shura when he was thirteen to help him see a glimpse of the charade they lived in.

But  _why_  was his brother spared to be raised as a weapon?

And for who?

Yukio gritted his teeth.

A weapon he would also be, but for his own nefarious purposes.

The twin son of Satan opened his eyes with his new resolve. It was not like before. He knew more on how to control his 'demons'. He just had to keep resisting their temptations to give in. Like his foster father, Yukio finally accepted the reality that he was being strongly influenced by Satan's will, or  _something,_  awakening his true self. While he was not like Rin, he had no safe guard from his paternal lineage either.

He pulled out the key that would gain access to Illuminati headquarters, and took a step toward the door to unlock it. After passing through, the Okumura twin found himself in a large room that was dimly lit. It looked more like a control room with rows of monitors above a counter on each side, displaying different views of other rooms or streams of data. It felt cooler, and held a stuffy, musty smell. Of course he would not walk into a lobby or reception area. That would have been too easy.

"Ah… hello," he heard the woman as she stepped out from behind another console. Her face held no emotion as she acknowledged him, her eyeglasses reflecting back the light of the monitors. This authoritative woman with an almost white streak going through her hair had never formally introduced herself, nor had he heard yet on who she was. He only knew she was a high ranking officer. "This comes as a surprise, Okumura Yukio."

"Yes… I have decided.." he started softly, his voice tone becoming louder in his effort to sound more sure of himself. "To join the Illuminati."

"So you have," the woman kept some distance from him as she spoke. "Does anyone know that you are here?"

The eye contact she held had shifted to someone beyond him. Yukio did not turn, but through his peripheral vision he saw the guards on each side as they approached.

"Yes. I made certain I was not followed," he answered. Yet, she didn't seem entirely convinced from the look on her face. Perhaps it was because their favorite double spy was just that good.

"Well then, please hand over your firearms," the four-eyed head lady motioned to him.

That request reminded Yukio, in an unsettling way, just how much 'they' knew about him.

He carried the twin pair of 9mm glocks not just for protection, but because they honestly suited him well for the meisters that he chose. Sure, other weapons like swords required close combat, and he never felt safe or effective enough using them. This was something Shura teased him about, further backing up her reason why she called him a four-eyed chicken. He made it a point afterwards to prove that he was just as effective with his guns as she was with her demon sword. And as a doctor, he agreed with his father's reasoning that guns covered more ground, more effectively. They were like glorified syringes, administering medicine in the form of bullets to those affected.

_..'You had always been walking the path that your foster father had set for you'..._

_Did I really want to be like him?_

The stern woman repeated her request, quickly redirecting his focus. "I said: hand over your guns."

Yukio finally complied by unbuckling the leather straps of his hostler, and handed that with the guns to one of the tall, burly guards.

Once the guard pulled one of the guns out, he handed it over to her. The head lady smirked, holding it up and pointing to the insignia etched into the barrel. "Ah.. these are from the Knights of the True Cross. I take it you have not formally resigned yet?"

"No, but..." Yukio quickly formulated his next response to deter her suspicions. He kept his answer simple, with the assumption that they already know the more well-known facts about himself. "My foster father had given them to me when I turned twelve… I've held onto them for sentimental reasons now."

She nodded, handing the gun back to the guard. "Hm. I just want to confirm a few more things first," the light shining from the lenses of her glasses when she stepped closer. "Why have you decided to join the Illuminati, now? I ask, because the information we had gathered from you earlier did not show any possible indication."

Finally, a question he felt more prepared to answer. This type of answer was one he had thought over carefully, because he didn't want to risk breaking the Morina's Contract that Lightening put on him. "Yes, you're right… it wasn't an easy decision to make. However, that was  _before_  I realized something… like why I was trained to replace Father Fujimoto in the event something were to happen to him."

The head lady crossed her arms as she listened, her face showing little emotion.

"What concerns me the most is  _why_  the True Cross believes that my brother is their best weapon," Yukio explained, his voice even and held steady eye contact with the woman. His reasons were chosen to fuel his purpose, even though she acted like it meant little to her. "His flames are not truly fueled by Satan. Rin has been told repetitively, warned in fact, to not unleash his full power or he will be executed. Regardless of that, my brother is afraid of Satan and what destruction He possesses."

"Yes… it's rather apparent that  _both_  of you are  _afraid_  of His power."

Her taunt struck him, but he wasn't going to let her know just how much. "Rin may be my brother, but he does not understand his weaknesses. Even though he is a full-fledged demon, he still has the heart of a human. If Sir Pheles wishes to use Rin as a weapon against you, I can be your counter measure."

"In that case, would your heart be aligned with our mission?"

Yukio did not want to respond that question directly, hoping that his own conclusion may suffice. "I am my brother's key to unlocking Satan's power. But as long as we are kept separate, then Rin's demon heart will not awaken. It's possible Sir Pheles is aware of this, and that is why they have not explained anything to either one of us about what is going on."

"Hmm," she smiled with an oddly amused grin. He decided that was the impressed reaction that he was trying to achieve. "You are a perceptive one."

"The Knights have right to be worried about us…" Yukio said, pressing his lips together for a moment before continuing. Yes, all he had to go by were educated guesses. But not knowing if he was really right in thinking that way was driving him mad. He just knew one thing for certain. "My own power is awakening."

"I heard."

"There's no doubt that the Order would restrain me once they realized it… but Sir Pheles hasn't said anything. I'm sure he knows…" Yukio paused, thinking again about when Lightening brought him in front of the Vatican officials, with those questions about Toudou. That possessed individual deeply scared him in a way he couldn't describe, but if those officials thought he would tell them how he really felt about that encounter, they were wrong.

"Lucifer said he could awaken my dormant powers."

There. He said it, even though his heart still resisted the very idea, and he held his breath waiting for her answer.

"Very well then," she smiled, but in a manner that didn't seem as reassuring. "In the time being, please go with them until further instruction."

Yukio nodded, somewhat understandably. He did just walk-in unannounced afterall. The handcuffs, however, were not as expected, and the events that followed were something short of a sick comedy. The younger Okumura tried to not look too dismayed when one of the guards had that moment of realization his arm was in a sling. Then the other guard yelled at the other to cuff him above the elbows instead. The first guard shot back that he would still need to take Yukio's arm from the sling to do so. That was when the head lady demanded they stop and not bother with that step. The end result left him with his good arm being held securely by one of the bodyguards.

The two guards led him a couple floors down to a small room with gray cinder-block walls and no windows. A florescent light flashed on, revealing a small table and a couple chairs off to one side. The plainness of it left Yukio wondering if it was an interrogation room, or at one point, a holding cell.

He was told to sit at the chair by the table, and then much to his chagrin, his good hand was handcuffed to the table. Those two apparently had trust issues with him. Yukio sighed as he watched the door click closed. It probably was locked from the inside also.

The control he held over his nerves slipped even more when he thought about his current situation. He felt trapped and defenseless, a position he wished to not have in the last place he wanted to be. He braced against that fearful feeling trying to take over. As long as he kept his senses, he could get out of this. He never was as weak as he appeared.

Because the idea of surrendering completely to the Illuminati still made him feel sick. He only came to find the answers that he wasn't able to get anywhere else. Yes, he believed that the Order would restrain him, if they knew, if not be threatened with the same warnings as his brother from the Vatican. He could just as easily guess that the Illuminati would grossly exploit his power, once it was realized. The only comfort that Yukio had was if he did lose control of his actions, his body, at least they could have the means to keep him in check. That was a big 'if', however. 'Keeping in check' may mean instant death.

Even now, he had that feeling that Satan didn't have a side. The King of Demons would do whatever he wanted to reach his goals, regardless of  _who_  it was for. Yukio could never give in to a reason like that, to let Satan unleash his power and flames.

Would he also become a demon like Rin … or would he become possessed by His might? The report of what happened to Izumi haunted him… she admitted to the Knights she believed it was possible to gain control of the nine-tails, but the power of the fox spirit was too strong for her. Satan was the king of demons… Yukio had no chance! He would have to find a way to resist before it came to that.

He looked at the table he was cuffed to again, thinking that if he crouched under it and lifted it up with the table on his back, he could slide the cuff off the leg. The way it was now was stupid.

The door had opened at that moment, and Yukio's eyes darted upwards. Upon acknowledging who it was, the young Okumura twin sat more upright in his chair. In fact, if he wasn't cuffed to the table leg, he would have been standing up in shock.

"So we meet again. How exciting!" Saburouta Toudou practically glowed, his youthful grin spreading from ear to feathery ear. "Shall we let bygones be bygones then?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN:
> 
> Thank you for reading! This certainly is shaping up to be a lot more involved that I first thought.
> 
> It probably did not help that I had been more influenced by the translation of Weekend Hero of Kato's light novel, and the Exorcist Salaryman spinoffs that I came across too. (Watches her serious plot line fly out the window) *facepalm*
> 
> We'll find out more about Shiemi in the next chapter though.
> 
> I also saw this movie called the Dark Tower. And they had a protagonist who fought off the evil with guns too. Liked the creed so much, I thought it could apply here also.
> 
> The Dark Tower – full gunslinger creed:I do not aim with my hand. He who aims with his hand has forgotten the face of his father. I aim with my eye. I do not shoot with my hand. He who shoots with his hand has forgotten the face of his father. I shoot with my mind. I do not kill with my gun. He who kills with his gun has forgotten the face of his father. I kill with my heart.

**Author's Note:**

> Apparently, I love stories with profound character building, and dynamic brother/ team building relationships. Took a break from Big Hero 6 and Voltron Legendary Defender to write this. 
> 
> Hopefully I can pull off the two personalities of the twins okay! Rin is a lot easier to write for than Yukio. 
> 
> I grew up following a lot of archangel lore, so seeing Kato's version of the demon world is interesting. In AoE, Satan and Lucifer are different entities, but some insight observed from other fans studying the concept has helped.


End file.
